There is the “real/true” version of ourselves, and then there is the anxious/depressed/angry version that’s the life we are living day to day.

The further apart the real us is from the version we are living day to day, the more distressed, frustrated and stuck we will feel.

What does the real or true you want and desire? Do you find yourself saying or thinking “I wish I could …” but never doing those things. Yet the only thing stopping you … is you.

If we think about anxiety as an example. Anxious people are more likely to make safe choices, to avoid risk, to stick with the familiar, to avoid being too noticed or too unique/different. This might mean wearing lots of black clothing, or not expressing opinions, it might mean taking someone else’s advice rather than following our own instinct, not driving to new places, not feeling able to leave a job or relationship even though its not good for us.

The longer anxiety/depression/anger etc has been present, the more that feels like it is us, that its just our personality. Yet underneath those symptoms, the real us is there, we still have desires, we have instincts/gut reactions. But the problematic emotions stop us living that life.

Therapy can help you to become the real and authentic you again. To make the gap smaller between what you really want and what you are actually doing.

A self help starting point for this is to make a bit of a list of the 2 versions of things – what you want to do and what you are actually doing for lots of scenarios, and set yourself weekly goals of small steps you can take to make the gap smaller.

If you want to find out how I can help, have a read of my website at or ring me on 07588576026

By |2020-01-05T20:34:15+00:00January 3rd, 2019|Blog Posts|0 Comments